Tuesday, February 8, 2011

The ace in the hole

Abut a month ago I set out on this not so impossible task. To lose 30 lbs by my 30th birthday.  I figured 10 lbs a month, that's reasonable? What I didn't plan on was how difficult it would be.  How my dead-on-arrival metabolism would make it very difficult to lose weight even when burning max calories and following a low cal diet plan.  True I don't restrict myself, a diet with restrictions will only cause me to fail, but I am limiting myself.  I was able to quickly lose 8 lbs in about 2 weeks, but after a few events (my sister's b-day and a week of inactivity due to illness) caused me to gain 4 back.  My body won't even let me have a little wiggle room. So not fair. 

Since then I've been battling back, lost 2 of the 4 I gained for a total of 6 lbs this (not quite) month.  Trying to re-gain my motivation to work out while working an erratic schedule at the hospital and  preparing for and arranging a move has been rough, no lie.  The time that I actually have at home I feel that I have so much to do and so little time to do it! What's a fat girl to do?!

I have been unsuccessful time and time again with getting over this initial hump. It is my Achilles's heel.  Always losing and gaining back the same 10lbs over and over for the past 3 years, and even before that, always the same 10-15 lbs over and over.

Instead of looking at another attempt that has ended in failure I looked into other options. Starving myself is not going to work, because hello? I love food! Working out 6 hours a day not feesable when I am the bread winner in this family.  Seriously hate throwing up, so bulimia is out. Surgery is cheating, and there is no magic pill that will allow you to eat whatever you want and not work out and lose weight anyhow. But  I  think I found an ace in the hole. I'm trying something new, I found something that I think is really going to help (not cure, not fix, not do the work for me mind you...help).  It's not entirely one of those quick fix things, it's going to require a shit ton of effort and self control on my behalf. But it's a six week program that promises results or...wait for it...your money back guaranteed!! Trust me, I'm super skeptical already.

I won't go into details about it here until I know that it is going to work.  And if it does? I promise I will share this info with you.  Because we could all use an ace in the hole every now and then right?


  1. I'm so proud of you anyway and I think you're beautiful.

  2. I always think of it this way: "If I died tomorrow, I would be really happy I ate that brownie, rather than deprived myself of that wonderful moment." I go through periods where I am good, like losing 10 lbs before a vacation so that I can gain it back on said vacation. lol.