Thursday, February 3, 2011

On why I'll never be a kept woman.

My only ambition in life is to be a "kept" woman.  To stay at home with the kids, have dinner on the table for my family when my husband gets home from work (ok, so I just set women back about 50 years, but dammit it's my right to want to be a housewife!), care for my children, ect... I mean I pretty much already do all of this, I just have to work in between. And that part sucks.  While I'm whiling away at work, listening to patients complain about their health, about why they have to have so much blood drawn, about the hospital food, and such, my mind is busy thinking of the many things that needed to be done around the house today and that after my 12 hour shift I will not have the energy to get that stuff done.  Oh the woe's of my life. 

I had a taste of the housewife lifestyle. I was lucky enough to have been able to stay at home the entire first year of my son's life. At first I thought I would go crazy, being the girl who once worked two jobs and went to school full time just to keep myself occupied, but indeed I settled comfortably into  the housewife role.  I busied  about my home everyday, (being anal and having OCD surely helped with this)  and had time to attend to any errands such as the post office and grocery store all at my leisure. It was a taste of something good, and I have been craving it ever since.

But fate would have other plans. My husband lost his great job with awesome government benefits, and we had an infant to care for. So this super mom sprung to action, doing whatever it took to care for her family. And since then I have been like the female lion, caring for and supporting my family. Going out and putting in long hours hunting, bringing the latest kill home for the cub and the lazy male lion to enjoy. (Am I resentful much?) But this is what needed to be done.  My parents did not raise me to be helpless, nor to ever depend on others to care for me. And now the lazy male lion is in school, almost done with his AA, but that doesn't mean this lioness gets a reprieve.  No, because I want what every mom wants, and that is the best opportunity for her children.

Having dabbled in the world of education I have seen how downhill public schools have gone, how simple values have been lost, how the government brushes education under the rug and cuts from that budget constantly.  My youngest brother-in-law is a product of private education, the kid is a genius, excellent grades in school, and a full ride to Notre Dame, along with his girlfriend and two of his friends. Now how often does that happen? You get to go to an Ivy league college, far away with three people you've known since grade school? Freaking sweet. In society today, education is kind of "you get what you pay for".  Now, please don't misinterpret, I and several of my wonderful friends, are all products of public education, and my sister is a teacher at our Alma Mater. But I want what's best for my son, meaning, Ivy league colleges in the future (should that be his choice) just like my parents wanted my life to be better than theirs by offering me the best of what they could.

Now, my working to put the kiddo's through private school isn't the only reason I'll never be a kept woman. I have taste, and I like the nicer things in life. Try as I may to be humble, I am a princess.  I have an eye for quality.  My mother taught us to be thrifty, to look at the price per ounce of things, for what would be the better bargain, and I am a damn thrifty shopper, but I buy name brand when I know the quality and taste is better.  I like expensive restaurants, rarely eat fast food (if we eat out, it better be at a sit down) and love entertainment such as going to see off-Broadway shows, vacations, and museums, things that enrich the mind and bring culture to a dry palate. I'm not even sure where any of this came from seeing as my parents are both pretty humble.

All of these things would be possible, with limits if we were a single income family.  My husband's BA in computer networking will be able to afford us nice things.  But I also want the comfort of having a little extra, and that means somethings must be sacrificed in the name of good living.  My freedom of domestic bliss. Sure in a couple months I'll get a taste of that freedom again, but it will come with a heavy price, and it won't last long. I must admit that I am a bit jealous of all of you who can stay at home!  So maybe someone should just discover my clever writing and pay me to stay at home and write a book or something...That way I can have the best of both worlds?

Hey, a girl can dream right?

1 comment:

  1. yes you can dream! hell, maybe we'll win the publisher's clearing house. that 10 mill is sounding pretty nice.