Self waxing gone wrong

For the past year I have been getting regular bikini waxing done. While this in itself is quite the experience, I’ve tolerated it well. My first wax was a Brazilian at a place called the pretty kitty. It was...uncomfortable, and a little embarrassing (the on all fours spreading your cheeks kind of embarrassing) But shaving leaves me very uncomfortable, with terrible razor burn, and after the first wax, I swore I’d not shave my bikini area again.
However, I don’t always have the time to go get a wax. And let’s be honest, the cost and uncomfortable feeling of someone being knee deep in your goods, ripping hair from my tender regions leaves me cold and I put it off.  I looked into a couple of places in the desert that offer laser hair removal after my friend got a few areas done, but it was really expensive and I don’t have time to drive down the hill for that. So..... I bought an at home waxing kit thinking, how hard can it be?
Well, it was pretty rough.

The kit contained the wax, some popsicle sticks, and the cloth strips, so I read the directions and went to town. The first few strips weren’t bad, I’m pretty used to the feeling by now and it didn’t bother me, at first...the further south I worked, the worse things got.  I had to turn myself into a human pretzel to get the “leg pits” as my kids call them.  That’s where the pain started, I put the wax on too thick in some places and had to go back and redo spots.   Where a typical wax would take around 20 mins this took me over an hour.  There was sweat, blood, and tears, no joke! My thighs are actually bruised, it hurts to walk and I’m probably more humiliated now then spreading my butt cheeks for a 115 lb, 20 year old girl who just got her esthetician license.  It’s not pretty, I didn’t finish, and I’ll never do it again. Just pay to get your girl parts waxed!
I’m not the hero you all want but I’m the hero you all deserve. You’re welcome.